I used to be the mom that always had her twins matching or coordinating. Honestly, it’s cute, and fun, and why wouldn’t I put my girls in cute matching outfits? I was serious about it too. If one got her clothes dirty at home and we were going out later, they both got changed. The only time you would see them not matching is if they were going to bed or I needed to use our backup outfit while we were out (and let’s be honest, they had matching pjs too).
My matching/coordinating was such common knowledge that when I was pregnant with my second set of twins, my neighbors all got me boy/girl coordinating clothing at my baby shower. Everything was in a pair. I realized it’s much harder to find coordinating clothes for a boy and a girl, instead of two girls though. Additionally, my girls were always the same size, and my son quickly jumped a size ahead of his twin sister.
My older girls matched or coordinated until they were about 3.5, and then they started wanting to wear their own things. It was surprisingly hard to let go of picking their clothes, but luckily not being able to match the younger two eased me into it.
Now that my babies are almost 3 and my older girls just turned 5, I’m so glad I let go of my need to pick clothes.
My youngest daughter decided she needed to start picking her own clothes a little after turning 2. As in, she refuses to wear jeans, most shoes, socks, and all coats. For a couple of months she would only wear dresses with a skirt underneath, but not the dress I picked, she would have to pick it. And heaven forbid you tried to cover up the dress she picked with a coat to keep her warm! So I had to layer a long sleeve shirt under all of her dresses, and if it was truly cold, fight her tooth and nail to get the coat on.
At first I was a little (a lot) annoyed by it, since it does take longer to get her dressed and out the door, but now it’s fun to see her personality come out, and we get some amazing comments from people when we’re out.
You might wonder why I let a 2 year old have that much control over things, but let me tell you, I have learned that letting my kids pick their clothes, as long as they’re decently covered, isn’t worth the fight. We still have meal time, bedtime, tv time, and tons of other things that I have to put my foot down about; whether she wears a dress with a skirt and the same shoes she’s worn for 2 months, or the shirt I wanted her to wear isn’t worth the struggle in the grand scheme of things.
With no prompting from me, my older girls have reverted back to matching/coordinating almost every day, including when they go to bed. We have neighbors next to us that have identical twin girls the same age as my girls, who I can’t tell apart for the life of me. In my twin girl’s minds, since no one can tell the twin neighbor girls apart, no one can tell them apart either, especially if they dress the same.
Really it’s hilarious, because even though they have the same coloring, they’re clearly NOT identical. But they’ll dress the same and tell me that since they’re matching I don’t know who’s who. Then they giggle laugh when I pretend to be confused. It’s cute.
Plus they’ve started to realize being a twin is something unusual and people think it’s cool. If they dress their own way people just think they’re siblings, but dressed the same people will ask if they’re twins.
Third – Too much work.
It’s not worth keeping track of that many clothes. When I just had the girls, fine, two sets of outfits wasn’t bad to manage every day. But now, no way am I managing 4 sets of outfits. The only times my kids are matching is Christmas and Easter; maybe an obligatory family picture, but otherwise, if they have something on top, something on bottom, and shoes when we leave the house, it’s good enough.
I think part of letting go of picking clothes came with having more kids, but part of it was them finally asserting their different personalities. Of course they had different personalities the whole time, but at 9 months I could dress them however I wanted. Now they dress however they want. I still control what clothes they have to pick from in their closet, so what’s the harm in letting them have a little fun with what they wear?